Harmonious Hearts 2014--Stories from the Young Author Challenge by Laura Beaird

Harmonious Hearts 2014--Stories from the Young Author Challenge by Laura Beaird

Author:Laura Beaird [Press, Harmony Ink]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Dreamspinner Press


WE ATE in silence. I didn’t know what to say to Luke. Every time I went to open my mouth, I would close it before I blurted out something I didn’t want him to hear. A few times I imagined him doing the same thing. He didn’t speak at all. He didn’t even make a noise. So it startled me when he grabbed my hand and laced our fingers together. He looked up at me, his eyes expressionless for a moment. He wasn’t smiling.

“I can’t do this,” we blurted out together.

Grimacing, I started to pull away, but he stopped me. “You can’t do what? Us?” The fear must have been obvious in my voice, because he frowned slightly.

He shook his head. “No, that’s not it at all. I can’t have sex. I’m not ready.”

I stared at him. He was looking at our clasped hands, frowning at them, worry lines marring his face. I couldn’t believe it. And my silence obviously bothered him, because he started to pull away.

“That’s what I meant too. I….” I paused, and he looked at me. “I wish I could. And it doesn’t mean I’ll never want to do it, because I do. It’s just—”

“Your parents?” he asked.

I nodded, fighting the tears that threatened to fall. A harsh laugh fell from my lips. “Yeah, even in death they know how to fuck with me. Sometimes… sometimes I wished they’d died earlier than they did. Makes me sound like a monster, right? But it’s the truth.”

“Hey, that doesn’t make you a monster,” he insisted and pulled me into a hug. “If you want to call someone a monster, call your dad one. Or your mom even, but not yourself. You are not a monster. They were the monsters.”

He kissed the side of my face and just held me. I didn’t cry, but it was close. A lot of emotions I had bottled up for years were starting to spill as life began to settle down. It brought me back to those bad times, and that scared me more than I was willing to admit to anyone. Luke and Ste were great; they supported me. And neither of them pushed me—except for the counseling Ste made me have—and that was how I liked it.

“I guess my mom was right,” I whispered.

He kissed me. His tongue tracing the seam of my lips gently before he pulled away. “Neither of them were right about you. To me, you’re perfect, and that’s the way you’re going to stay. So I don’t want to hear you talk like that anymore.”

I snuggled against him, my cheeks burning. “I’m so glad I never had to meet them,” he muttered. I could feel the tension in his body; it made him stiffen even as he held me. I didn’t like that one bit.

“Did you mean it?” I asked, changing the subject. “About not being ready to have sex, I mean.”

He smiled, and his whole face lit up. “Yeah, I meant it. I thought I was ready, but… I don’t know.



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